Stop Waiting to be in a "Better Place": Advice to Self

I get so caught up in the idea of how things should be and the skeleton of how they are supposed to be done. What I mean is, I create this formula of how I think things should be, how things should be written, and how things should be recorded & expressed, in order to grow and get results. In that way of thinking, I have stopped myself from consistently keeping up with things I love to do, just because I'm waiting for this imaginary timeline or this feeling of comfort that is nonexistent.

I feel like this could either be categorized as advanced procrastination or... depression; either way, it's not a great place to be in and I am definitely not a fan. I was recently reading an interview with Rachel Bloom. She shared that someone said to her and it has stayed with her, and I can understand. "Procrastination is Fear." Every once in a while, I realize that I am not doing the things I said I would, or keeping up with things I wanted to, and it's usually for the same reason. Somewhere along the line, I created some kind of excuse surrounding my life that caused me to stop with some sort of hope to begin again. Maybe I'm just scared. Fearful that doing the things I want to do may not turn out the way they are in my head. Fearful that after you do the things you said you wanted to do, you are left feeling like you wasted your time. Fearful that people will see what you are doing and provide their own unsolicited judgment on it.

Now, I am not trying to invalidate the things that go on in my life; I'm not saying that there are no life-prohibiting things that I have to deal with in my personal life. I am, however, choosing to hold myself accountable in the simple fact that there are many times throughout my day and the overall daily life that I could be utilized for things that I want to do. But I don't, because my consistent excuse is that there will be a "better time" in the near future. That snowballs into waiting days, then weeks, then months until it is no longer an idea.

This is a phenomenon many artists face daily. As I converse with the art-makers closest to me, although there is always work being done, our passion projects sometimes fall to the sidelines. That can be so discouraging, Time is more of a nagging passerby than a consistent friend. So what do we do? My advice to myself is to JUST GO FOR IT.

Maybe next month you'll have all the time in the world, and you will be the most inspired you've ever been! Or, maybe the world flips upside down and you never have the chance to even think about it again. The point is, stop waiting to be in a better place because there is no promised better place. You are here, right now, and that makes this very moment better than anything.